If I’m not blogging, that means things are going so well that I don’t even need to document it. Oh, the newfound joys of privacy. And some.
Usually it’s really easy for me to write how I feel but it feels like I’ve been in a stump for a long while. Either that, or I no longer want to publicize every detail of my life. But this is the truth.
Up until recently, my blog was primarily an outlet for me and my daily adventures and was very relationship-focused (or rather, my lack of a relationship), with the majority of posts on single girl probs and bitching about men. Now that I’ve been seeing a particular someone, I have to be honest — I have been holding back on my most recent posts. I haven’t been writing about him in too much detail because, well, I didn’t want to become one of those girls that I had previously bitched about, the ones who constantly talk about their boyfriend and whatnot. I didn’t want to be hypocritical even though I was ecstatic. I didn’t want to blog about how happy I was. Because no one wants to read about someone being happy. And that’s when I stopped blogging for a while. But then I realized, it wasn’t just because I didn’t want to blog about this guy, it was because I wasn’t writing for me anymore. I was writing for an audience. I loved the attention, I’m not going to lie. Who doesn’t? And that’s why being an attention whore sucks.
I want to say that I am back, but who knows. I’m home only half of the time, hardly have access to my laptop for my time away from home, and honestly, I am working on my privacy. I have always been a transparent person and everyone puts on a facade, or wants to be perceived a certain way. But it’s time I started blogging for real again. For myself. The reason I started blogging when I was 13. Because I love writing and it gives me someone to talk to without having to really talk to anyone at all. Can’t wait to get back to being real.
It was my friend’s birthday on the weekend and he said something to me that kind of made me chuckle and think. As you may know already, I blog regularly on some enjoyable topics including men, dating, and uh, my hilarious life in general. Particularly, my dating life has been well-documented on my blog — the good, the bad, and the ugly. What my friend said to me was something along the lines of, “Man, I’d be scared to date you because if I piss you off, I’ll probably end up on your blog the next day”. And it kind of caught me off guard…but not entirely because this isn’t the first time I’ve heard it before. This is maybe the fourth or fifth time I’ve heard a comment like that before. Am I really that intimidating?! Oh wait, correction. Is my blog that intimidating?!?!
I’m completely normal, I swear.