This is why you should (have). Behold. My Bachelor Canada video submission. Let the hilarity ensue.
The end. (I am now off the market, sorry boys!)
Also, big thanks to my friend Aaron for filming and editing this whole video. And additional thanks to Julia, Danielle, and Manu for giving me your “testimonials” (unscripted, I swear). AND a HUGE thanks to all the dick douchebags that contributed to my fabulous dating history and gave me tons of reasons to bitch and to audition for this show in the first place! Ha!
Single. Solo. Independent. Those are common words I use to describe myself, namely my current marital status. Being single is great, it really is, but there are just those random days where I end up feeling like shit. I’m feeling much better now but the background of this blog post has been incubating for the past week and I really couldn’t find the words. And then I found it. Lonely. That’s another word, and perhaps a more appropriate word, to describe my situation.
For the past few years, I’ve been subjected to third wheeldom. Token single girl. The independent woman. All in all, it’s been great — focusing on school (done that), continually working on my business (always hustlin’), and desperately trying to figure out what I want to do (ongoing). But honestly — and this is me opening up — it sucks when you don’t have someone to share your happiness and struggles with. As one of the only single girls in my core group of friends, I’m finding it difficult to even reach out to my close friends nowadays. I feel like a burden, or that they have so much going on in couple world to the point where they’ve forgotten what it feels like to be alone. And it sucks.
It’s part of my nature that I refuse (or reluctantly) ask for help so I have adopted some not-so-great habits or methods of coping with loneliness. Men. I use and abuse them. Or maybe it’s the other way around? Who knows — up to one’s interpretation. And to be honest, I can’t say I’m proud of some recent choices I’ve made. But honestly, that’s how I deal with things and sure, it’s not the most conventional way of behaving but atleast I get to experience a bit of temporary relief and companionship that I’ve been craving for the past few years.
Sad, but true. Because honestly, when was the last time I even went out on a real date? WTF is even considered a “date” nowadays?! My girl B defines a date as an instance where two people go out with the intention of dating. At the time I agreed with her. But now I’m beginning to question that definition. I go to dinner with people with no expectations because, well, I don’t want to be disappointed. And since disappointment happens so frequently with me, having that “intention” or even that thought becomes lost. It becomes an internal struggle. When you want something so bad, it just never happens, or the opposite happens. And then you have to start all over again.
I mean, I’m fine now. But I really wanted to jot down how I felt about this situation because I always get asked, “How are you single?”, “Any new guys?”, “Still single?” and it’s beginning to become mundane. Stop. Thanks.
It was my friend’s birthday on the weekend and he said something to me that kind of made me chuckle and think. As you may know already, I blog regularly on some enjoyable topics including men, dating, and uh, my hilarious life in general. Particularly, my dating life has been well-documented on my blog — the good, the bad, and the ugly. What my friend said to me was something along the lines of, “Man, I’d be scared to date you because if I piss you off, I’ll probably end up on your blog the next day”. And it kind of caught me off guard…but not entirely because this isn’t the first time I’ve heard it before. This is maybe the fourth or fifth time I’ve heard a comment like that before. Am I really that intimidating?! Oh wait, correction. Is my blog that intimidating?!?!
I’m completely normal, I swear.
Want to date me (well who wouldn’t)? Here are my do’s and don’t’s for the fellas:
– DO show up on time. I can be late (hardly ever), but you can’t. Thanks.
– DON’T make future plans with me if you don’t intend on keeping them. On that note, please refrain from using the term, “we”.
– DO chivalry. It’s not dead. Pay the bill, open the door, and walk me to my car. I like that.
– DON’T overly make fun of me. I know I’m awkard, but I’m cute so I can pull it off.
– DO honesty. From the beginning. Read.
– DON’T piss me off. Do you really want to be on my blacklist? Don’t underestimate my ability of ruining your life. There may be (usually is) collateral damage.
– DO be yourself. I’m dorky and awkward too. I’m nonjudgmental. I like everyone.
I also like to break the rules a lot. Sometimes I’ll text you first (although I don’t enjoy it), maybe drive to you (only applicable if you live downtown), and not abide by the third date rule (what’s that?). Other than that, what’s not to love?
Nope, none. Why? Because lately it’s been all work, no play…which is why I am bringing the question out to you guys! I’m thinking of starting my dating escapades again but where from this time?
Club? Craigslist? HighSchool? Restaurant? Work? Gym? Blind date? I’m running out of ideas! I like unconventional routes too, to keep it interesting. I’m actually signed up for speed dating next month (thanks Groupon!) and I’ve had some suggestions for Twitter (decent) and Chatroulette (not so much). Gotta add some spice to my life!
Oh, and what about Drew? Wellll…… this week was supposed to be designated gelato week BUT I actually haven’t run into him yet. And yes. This is when it helps if I had his number. Which I don’t. But he does. He technically does. He has my business card/has yet to contact me for cupcakes. A route that I am leaning towards is messaging him on Facebook — we’re not friends. Yet. I’m crazy. I know. But I’m giving it til next Tuesday for something to happen! Damn you Murphy’s Law.
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I was being (half) serious about this post. And yes, I actually did end up meeting with a few of them. Some normal, some nerdy, and some just plain creeper. I’m telling you, these guys have ZERO game. I can now understand why they are using Craigslist. It actually went downhill as my “dates” progressed. Oh my. Well…
1) Italian man. This was on Friday night.He was actually normal. Tall, handsome, well-groomed. Oh, and he had an Italian accent… ’nuff said. Traveled the world and seemed to have a lot of life experience behind his belt. Did the Yaletown stroll for drinks which was awesome and did not come off as creepy at all. +1
2) Nerdy guy. So this was dumb, but I casually mentioned to this guy to say hi to me and work and, well, saying hello lasted like 2.5 hours. WTF. Okay. Well, he was actually very nice. I felt I could really be myself and be dorky (the Harry Potter nerd inside of me) because, well, he was like a super nerd. He got a tattoo on his whole back of Gallifrey (Google it. I dare you.). It went well except for the fact that he just didn’t know when to go and that he was not suave at all when he asked for my number (I didn’t give it out). Meh. +1
3) UBC guy. Okay, maybe the nickname is misleading since he’s just transferring there for thiscoming fall but, god, this was just horrible. First of all, he was ugly in person. Second of all, guy doesn’t know how to dress. Third, he makes the worst Chris Rock impressions (buddy, you’re fucking WHITE). Fourth, just talks way too much and veers off when I’m talking (bitch, do you know who I am?!). Yeah. Atleast he paid for dinner. -1
So far, I’ve had my good and bad. More good than bad, surprisingly. Wonder what the weekend will bring… Stay tuned.
What’s the difference? And is it really such a big deal? I remember back in highschool the terminology we used to use was “going out” or that we were “together”. Nowadays, it’s “seeing” and “dating” but what’s the difference? To my understanding, seeing is when you are seeing a person but it’s not exclusive as opposed to dating which is when it is made “official” and you are exclusive to one another. My sister thinks that me and gym guy are seeing eachother and I honestly would have to say no. And even if that thought came into my head, I would have no idea what to call it anyways. But why should I? Why should we put a label on it? After all, we’re just going out to see Wicked together, Taylor Swift, scootering around town, lunch and dinner, planning hiking trips for summer, movies, the Nutcracker, work out together, etc. because that’s what friends do… right?